If there was one decade that was even more frustrating than being a teenager, it was my 20’s. I mean, let’s be honest – you’re an adult, but not really. Everyone loves to credit 20’s as a carefree time, but for me, it turned out to be less of that once I had to figure out what path I wanted to take in life, which I THOUGHT I had to make all of my life’s decisions then. If I could go back (which I never would want to – 30’s are so awesome), here’s what I would tell her.

-Give yourself credit. You’re doing just fine. 

-You don’t have to figure it all out right now. Stop trying to. Just take a step in the direction you’ve been given and go with it.

-Stop wasting your time on guys who put you in “gray areas” for the sake of having partnership. That’s not what you want. Stop settling.

-The friends who challenge you and call you higher to be better and work on yourself are the keepers. 

-Spend your money and time on gaining experiences, not things.

-Travel, travel, travel, & travel some more.

-Stop investing in friends who suck the energy & happiness out of you. If you grumble when they call you, it’s a sign you need to let it go.

-Those toxic habits and thoughts will only continue to follow you as you put them in the back of your mind. Find a dope therapist and work through the issues.

-Learn how to speak up for yourself. No one has ever died because of honesty. Your voice and opinion matters!

-You are so worthy and you are enough, young lady. Stop trying to be like those girls who talk about you. You will never fit in.

-You have so many amazing things ahead of you. Keep your focus on loving God intimately and the rest will fall into place.

-Always go with your gut instincts. They have never led you astray.

-It’s okay to have feelings and need people. That doesn’t make you needy, it makes you human. 

-Embrace the fact that everything is not going to perfect and sometimes will be chaotic.

-Your feelings are valid. Your feelings are valid. YOUR FEELINGS ARE VALID!

-The answer you’re looking for is not venting on the phone with a friend; it’s going into prayer and within yourself.

-Validation is for parking. You do not need anyone or anything to be validated.

-Write everything down! Dreams, goals, feelings, aspirations, thoughts…all of it!

-Girl! Why are you wasting your time on him, him & him over there?! Stop settling for crumbs when a whole meal is being prepared for you.

-Live like you are loved, not trying to be loved.

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